How to Write a Love Letter (to a Woman)

How to Write a Love Letter (to a Woman)

The love letter has probably existed almost as long as written communication itself. But with today’s increasingly digitized, abbreviated correspondences, a handwritten love letter is something of a rarity, so knowing how to write a love letter as a means of expressing your desire and devotion for someone that much more special.

Take Your Time

take your time

The most important thing to keep in mind when composing a love letter is that you need to take your time.
If you write it in a rush, she’ll be able to tell, and your letter probably won’t have quite the impact you intended. Before you start writing, think of the main things you want to tell her, and the most powerful order in which you could reveal them. Be sure to read the letter aloud before you send it. The last thing you want is to sound like a rambling mess – even if that’s how she makes you feel. Remember, control is key.

Be Straightforward

never, ever use clichés
While you may think a love letter needs a lot of literary flourishes, clear and straightforward is better.Don’t steal from a famous writer or use words that you have to look up in a dictionary – again, she’ll probably be able to tell. And never, ever use clichés, which counts as any “poetic”-sounding combination of words that you’ve heard before (your lips are as red as a rose, your hair is as black as night). They are corny and unoriginal, and that’s not how you want the recipient to think of you. With that said, if you really want an added dash or romance, you might incorporate a well-chosen quotation from a famous writer that encapsulates how you feel about her – just don’t pretend you wrote that part yourself!

When writing a love letter, you want to be authentic and not write in a voice that is completely different from how you are every day, but you also want to be brave, revealing a little more of yourself to her than you have previously. Even if you are already in a relationship with your beloved, there are still probably some things she doesn’t know about the depth of your feelings for her that would touch her heart. Example: I never told you this, but I saved the bar receipt from the first night we met, because you had touched it.

As with good writing in general, details are key. You want to show more than you tell.

This means, don’t just tell her that you love what a good heart she has and that you can’t stop thinking about her. Instead, recall a memory you have of her taking care of her grandfather that revealed to you her generous nature and made you fall in love. Describe how your heart starts pounding at the very thought of her.

Focus

ladys reading love letter

Remember that the focus is on her, not on you or anything else. The letter should be about the things you love about her, your memories of/with her, the way she makes you feel. Don’t go on a tangent about your own qualities or romantic history.

Be Clear
show more than you tell

Love letters are especially tricky when you are not sure of the recipient’s feelings for you. Maybe this is someone whom you have admired from afar, or someone you were previously in a relationship with but haven’t spoken to in a long while. In this type of situation, part of the love letter’s job is to convince her to give you a chance. This is not an easy task; you don’t want to come across as too forceful (I will make you love me), but you also don’t want to sell yourself short (I’m sure you probably don’t feel the same way about me, as I don’t have much going for me). If this is the kind of love letter you’re writing, you want to be clear about your feelings, without sounding desperate or pushy. Don’t ask her for a commitment; just ask her to let you know if she feels something you.

Of course, no matter how you do it, you are putting yourself in a rather vulnerable position if you’re declaring a love that you’re not sure will be returned, but that’s what makes it romantic. No matter how she responds, you’ll know you were gutsy enough to risk being completely honest about your feelings for somebody – something which not many people are able to do.