12 Really Funny Christmas Movie Quotes

Over the centuries, the celebration of Christmas has evolved into many forms – most of them having little or nothing to do with the religious event being commemorated.

As the humorist, Dave Barry, wryly commented: “Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice”

There is no question that, in the western world at least, Christmas has become commercialized; one example of this is the creation of so called “Christmas movies.”

Since most recent examples of this genre are comedies, it is only natural that they would generate some funny Christmas movie quotes.

We set our Life Daily team the task of combing through the mass of available material and making a small selection that you can browse in a few moments.

Most of them relate to Christmas as it is now celebrated – a far cry from a manger in a stable in Bethlehem!

1. Harry Potter
Professor Dumbledore One can never have enough socks

Professor Dumbledore: “One can never have enough socks. Another Christmas has come and gone and I didn’t get a single pair. People will insist on giving me books.”

2. Simpsons
Bart Simpson Christmas birth of Santa

Bart Simpson: “Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa”

3. We’re No Angels
We're No Angels

Joseph: “I’m going to buy them their Christmas turkey”
Albert: “Buy? Do you really mean buy?”
Joseph: “Yes, buy! In the Spirit of Christmas. The hard part’s going to be stealing the money to pay for it.”

4. Married with Children
Al Bundy I hate Christmas

Al Bundy: “I hate Christmas. The mall is full of nothing but women and children. All you hear is, ‘I want this,’ ‘Get me this,’ ‘I have to have this’… and then there’s the children. And they’re all by my store ’cause they stuck the mall Santa right outside ringing his stupid bell. As if you need a bell to notice a 300-pound alcoholic in a red suit. ‘Ho, ho, ho,’ all day long. So, nice as can be, I go outside, ask him to shut the hell up. He takes a swing at me. So I lay a hook into his fat belly and he goes down. Beard comes off, all the kids start crying and I’m the bad guy.”

5. Elf
Elf Father Christmas

Father Christmas: “If you see a sign that says ‘Peep Show’, that doesn’t mean they’re letting you look at presents before Christmas.”

6. Home Alone
Home Alone

Santa Claus: “Damn. How can you give Kris Kringle a parking ticket on Christmas Eve? What’s next, rabies shots for the Easter Bunny?”

7. Robin Hood Prince of Thieves
Sheriff George of Nottingham call off Christmas

Sheriff George of Nottingham: “Cancel the kitchen scraps for lepers and orphans. No more merciful beheadings. And call off Christmas!”

8. Love Actually
Love Actually Christmas shopping. Never an easy or a pleasant task.

Harry: “Christmas shopping. Never an easy or a pleasant task.”

9. Jingle All The Way
Tony the Elf It's the Grinch! Scatter!

Tony the Elf: “It’s the Grinch! Scatter!”

10. A Charlie Brown Christmas
Charlie Brown Christmas

Charlie Brown: “Thanks for the Christmas card you sent me, Violet.”
Violet: “I didn’t send you a Christmas card, Charlie Brown.”
Charlie Brown: “Don’t you know sarcasm when you hear it?”

11. How the Grinch Stole Christmas
The Grinch Blast this Christmas music

The Grinch: “Blast this Christmas music. It’s joyful and triumphant.”

12. The Santa Clause
Charlie and Scott Calvin

Charlie: “These are Santa’s reindeer, aren’t they?”
Scott Calvin: “I hope not. These are… A gift. Probably from the cable company. We’re getting the Disney Channel now. Merry Christmas.”

Did you find that our funny Christmas movie quotes were a true reflection of how this event is regarded in our modern world?

Or do you think we were taking too cynical a view? Maybe you agree with Jay Leno’s quip: ” The only reason they don’t celebrate Christmas in Washington is that they couldn’t find three wise men and a virgin?”

Whatever you feel, you can share your thoughts simply by using the comments feed below.